Monday, February 3, 2014

Control Freak Strikes Again!



I’ve really slipped up lately.  Perhaps it’s the weather.  Perhaps I’ve been letting mediocre things take control of my attitude.  Or perhaps it’s my good old controlling nature getting the way again.  Either way, I’m back to feeling like my old self and that’s not good.  I killed that girl for a reason.  She was hindering me from becoming the person that I want to be.  I haven’t been to church in a while and I haven’t gone out and ridden my horse all by myself with just my thoughts for a while.  That has really affected my thought process.  I’ve been letting things that are way out of my control get me down and frustrate me.  It’s not only taken a toll on me, but also those around me.

I recently became involved with a new person.  We became fast friends and I knew that I wanted to have him in my life for a long time.  I wasn’t searching for any kind of relationship beyond friendship and I’m still not, but attraction and chemistry being what it is, things escalated somewhat quickly which led to miscommunication and confusion for both people.  I (obviously) have a tendency to put myself out there for the world to see.  This is me.  What you see is what you get.  I don’t lie, I don’t cheat, I don’t steal.  My life is an open book and I allow anyone to read it.  I wear my heart on my sleeve and I usually end up getting my feelings hurt.  I’ve tried to be different, but some things never change.  You are who you are and God made you that way for a reason.  When I jump in to something, I jump in feet first so that I can hit the ground running.  While I am somewhat impulsive, I don’t like to move quickly into relationships and I am not actively seeking a relationship.  But sometimes actions speak louder than words and at some point, both of our actions led to confusion with one another.  Now, for the last week, I have been working like a busy little worker bee to fix whatever damage may have been caused by these impulse actions and I only continue to make things worse.

It’s just like working with a problem horse.  They aren’t born problem horses…it is man-made issues that create problems down the line.  For example:  you’ve got a rider with a heavy hand.  He is constantly pulling on his horse’s mouth and eventually that horse stops responding to mouth pressure completely.  Pretty soon, he just starts doing whatever he wants.  He doesn’t stop, he doesn’t turn around, he runs through your hand…too much effort to control a situation usually leads to complete loss of control.

But I tend to let things consume me.  I’ve caught myself thinking constantly, “How can I fix this?  What can I do to make this better?  Why did God put this person in my path?”  All of these things are redundant.  I can’t fix anything.  I can’t make anything better.  And the only being who knows why this person was brought into my life is God Himself.  I will drive myself crazy trying to figure out things that are way beyond my control, versus just throwing my hands up in the air and saying, “This is in God’s hands.  I know that He has a plan for me and that plan is better than what I can even imagine for myself.”   I’ve let something that probably doesn’t even matter affect my mood, my attitude, and my life for a week.  I have wasted a week being confused because of another person’s actions and feelings which are completely out of my hands.  And I probably ruined a friendship in the process by trying to control every aspect of it instead of just letting it be.

We all slip and fall in life.  There are no perfect people.  Everyone struggles with addictions, be it addictions to substances, addictions to religion, addiction to people, or addictions to feelings.  I am addicted to the feeling of control and I am addicted to caring about what others think of me.  No matter how much of it I get in my life, it’s never enough and I have to have more.  Church and riding my horse is my rehab.  It puts everything in perspective for me and trains me to remember that I have very little control of my life.  You can’t rip a train off its tracks and expect it to get very far.  And that’s exactly what happens when we try to control every aspect of our lives.  We get stuck in a rut…not moving forwards and not moving backwards.  Just plain old stuck and completely off track. 

I’m tired of getting stuck.  I can sit here and tell you that I am NEVER going to do this again, but we all know that’s complete bullshit.  This is who I am and while I can recognize it now and pull myself out before it gets to be too big of a problem, I am always going to be that girl who cares too deeply, too quickly whether it be with friends, lovers, animals, jobs…anything.  I put 100% of myself into everything that I do so when it doesn’t go how I wanted it to, I experience serious disappointment. 

I’m not sure if the damage done with my friend is repairable or not.  But, I do know that I need to get on my horse and really spend some time visiting with God.  I have to remember that I started out this year with a purpose.  It’s barely February and I am already allowing myself to get off track because of a deep, dark desire to have people in my life that care as much for me as I do them.  They are out there, I just have to remember who they are and recognize that everyone that is placed in my path is not meant to LOVE me.  Maybe they are just here to teach me a quick lesson or remind me that I had a plan and I need to stick with it.  I know exactly what I need to do now.  As a cowgirl, I was taught that when you get bucked off, you dust yourself off and get back in the saddle.  I have done that over and over again in life.  Right now is not any different.  Who knows what will happen.  Maybe I get back on and that pony dashboards me a few more times.  Or, maybe I climb back up there to find I’ve ridden all the rough off of her and she’s the nicest nag I’ve ever ridden.  Either way, I’m not going down without a fight and I can’t make her something she’s not.  You just sit up in that saddle and enjoy the ride regardless.

My life is good.  I have a new, wonderful job opportunity.  I have a nice little horse that tries so hard for me every day.  I have a slew of good friends and family that love me despite all of my inadequacies.  I can’t keep letting my issues with loss and loneliness get in the way of my happiness.  I’ve talked about perfection before and how when you seek it, all you find is disappointment.  It’s time that I practice what I preach.  Psalm 9:10 says, “And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you.”  My day may be half over, but it’s never too late to start putting my life in His hands.  Any problems that you may have, He will be there to comfort you if you let Him.  I have spent the last week saying, “No, God…I don’t need you!  I got this!”  I should have been talking to Him and actually listening to His response.” 

I know that this is a blog about roping and my journey to get to the Reno Rodeo All-Girl.  I also realize that this blog post today didn’t have much to do with either of those subjects.  However, I want to point out that there are a lot of times we let our personal issues get in the way of the things that we really want in life.  The Bible teaches us that that is the Devil’s way of trying to hold us back.  He places temptation in our path and leads us astray so that we lose sight of what is really important.  I’m the first to admit that I am so guilty of this.  I hope this blog post today helps some of you to see that even the most driven, positive people slip up from time to time.  I have many people write to me and tell me that I am inspiring them to do great things and that means the world to me.  But I am far from perfect and I let things get the better of me sometimes too, just like everyone.  Please, whatever you are going through in life, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.  When you feel like you are simply surrounded by darkness, know that the light is coming.  Everyone goes through rough patches, you just have to keep the faith, know that you are strong, and you WILL get through it.    
 
As always, I thank you for continuing to read and supporting me on this journey.  I am praying for nicer weather and planning on entering some jackpots very soon (maybe even Wednesday if I get a chance to practice a little).  I also want to throw out a prayer request for my friends and family in California.  As I am sure you all know, we are experiencing a horrid drought out there.  If you like to eat, please pray for rain out there as we are currently at about 2% of our moisture and the entire state is in a state of emergency.  Thanks and God’s blessings to you and yours!





No comments:

Post a Comment